It could be the fact that Addy woke up from a bad dream, screaming, just before the alarm went off or it could be that I'm just feeling emo but today (so far) has been one of those days where everything is just wrong.
The worst of it is that I'm supposed to be happy and celebrating because we came to an agreement on the house! The lady finally countered yesterday and it was pretty much where we wanted to be so we took it! Inspection is taking place tomorrow and then we just wait for the closing.
I visited my mom yesterday and that always puts me in a funk. I always expect (hope) that she'll be better, that she'll magically have an appetite and strength and it's just not like that. Even though the chemo was over a week ago, she's still having issues with nausea and fatigue.
Then on the way home I had to call my brothers and scold them for not visiting. I realize we're all scared and it's hard to see her like that but I think we need to focus on her right now and she wants to see us. And it's not only her, it's my dad too. He's working from home indefinitely which means that he's not getting out much either.
I don't know how to end this so I just will.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
A House is not a Home
Welp Readers (all 2 of you), our offer was NOT accepted yesterday. I actually was pretty sure they'd counter because we completely low balled the offer. With their counter and then our counter to their counter, there is still a 9K gap between us. That's how much we don't agree.
Now, I feel kind of bad about the low offer but you should understand that we have a plan. See, the house needs new windows and a new furnace and while these things will probably last for another 1-5 years or whatever, I want to replace them before we even move in. I don't want to take care of it later. I don't want to find out on Nov. 15th when we turn on our furnace for the first time that it doesn't work. I want to deal with all of it up front.
So our plan was that we'd go in low and then after the inspection said that we need a new furnace and new windows, as long as there was nothing crazy, we would NOT ask for a reduction. Because we got the house at a lower price, we'd just take care of everything ourselves.
Now, C & I & our realtor all get the plan but I don't know if she does. Maybe she's scared that we'll ask for even more money after the inspection. Or maybe she owes on her home still and wants to be able to pay it off. Or maybe she just set a goal in her mind and doesn't want to let go of it.
But those things I talked about before plus the comparable sales in the area make me feel that the house isn't worth what she wants for it. We'll probably get another counter tonight and then we'll have to figure out what we want to do. C & I have a top number and if it comes to it, we'll walk away. It would be a shame but we will.
Thank God for our realtor though. She's been great at guiding us through our negotiations and assuring us that what we're feeling is perfectly acceptable. She's been a saving grace for sure.
Now, I feel kind of bad about the low offer but you should understand that we have a plan. See, the house needs new windows and a new furnace and while these things will probably last for another 1-5 years or whatever, I want to replace them before we even move in. I don't want to take care of it later. I don't want to find out on Nov. 15th when we turn on our furnace for the first time that it doesn't work. I want to deal with all of it up front.
So our plan was that we'd go in low and then after the inspection said that we need a new furnace and new windows, as long as there was nothing crazy, we would NOT ask for a reduction. Because we got the house at a lower price, we'd just take care of everything ourselves.
Now, C & I & our realtor all get the plan but I don't know if she does. Maybe she's scared that we'll ask for even more money after the inspection. Or maybe she owes on her home still and wants to be able to pay it off. Or maybe she just set a goal in her mind and doesn't want to let go of it.
But those things I talked about before plus the comparable sales in the area make me feel that the house isn't worth what she wants for it. We'll probably get another counter tonight and then we'll have to figure out what we want to do. C & I have a top number and if it comes to it, we'll walk away. It would be a shame but we will.
Thank God for our realtor though. She's been great at guiding us through our negotiations and assuring us that what we're feeling is perfectly acceptable. She's been a saving grace for sure.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Notes
Dear Face,
WTF?! I haven't had so many pimples since I was 13. I know I'm stressed but seriously.
Get it together.
Love, Me
Dear Cancer,
You suck. You are killing my mom and I have no way to fight back. That's just low.
Go away forever.
Love, Me
Dear Home Owner,
Please, please accept our bid. I promise to be nice to your house. Plus, weren't we just the cutest little family yesterday when you accidentally saw us leaving?
Waiting, Me
Dear Corey,
Thank you. You know why.
Love, Me
WTF?! I haven't had so many pimples since I was 13. I know I'm stressed but seriously.
Get it together.
Love, Me
Dear Cancer,
You suck. You are killing my mom and I have no way to fight back. That's just low.
Go away forever.
Love, Me
Dear Home Owner,
Please, please accept our bid. I promise to be nice to your house. Plus, weren't we just the cutest little family yesterday when you accidentally saw us leaving?
Waiting, Me
Dear Corey,
Thank you. You know why.
Love, Me
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Short & Sweet
This will be very quick.
We saw 6 more houses on Tuesday night and one is on our Maybe List. It's the first house we've looked at where we decided we could probably live in it. I will say, Tuesday went much better than the first time. This time we saw houses that we thought were very nice and maybe could have worked except for one little thing. I guess we're getting better at choosing houses to live in.
C is going to look at a bedroom set for Addy tomorrow. I found it on Craig's List and decided it looked pretty good. Hopefully as good in person... So Addy might have her Big Girl Bed by this weekend!
I want to talk about my mom but I don't want to talk about my mom. I hate seeing her weak and bald. I absolutely hate it. C told me it would be better when her hair grew back and I told him that I don't think she'll be around long enough for that to happen. And then I cried some. The chemo she's currently on is horrible. She told me last night that she basically hasn't eaten (or kept anything down) for 5 days. She is on the verge of just giving up because it's not worth it. I can't say I blame her.
I feel horrible about that.
I'm trying to make an effort to go over and visit or clean or sort things for her. Whatever will make her happy. I plan to go next week after work one day. I'm hoping it will help me deal a little better.
No wedding pictures, not sure what happened.
That's it.
We saw 6 more houses on Tuesday night and one is on our Maybe List. It's the first house we've looked at where we decided we could probably live in it. I will say, Tuesday went much better than the first time. This time we saw houses that we thought were very nice and maybe could have worked except for one little thing. I guess we're getting better at choosing houses to live in.
C is going to look at a bedroom set for Addy tomorrow. I found it on Craig's List and decided it looked pretty good. Hopefully as good in person... So Addy might have her Big Girl Bed by this weekend!
I want to talk about my mom but I don't want to talk about my mom. I hate seeing her weak and bald. I absolutely hate it. C told me it would be better when her hair grew back and I told him that I don't think she'll be around long enough for that to happen. And then I cried some. The chemo she's currently on is horrible. She told me last night that she basically hasn't eaten (or kept anything down) for 5 days. She is on the verge of just giving up because it's not worth it. I can't say I blame her.
I feel horrible about that.
I'm trying to make an effort to go over and visit or clean or sort things for her. Whatever will make her happy. I plan to go next week after work one day. I'm hoping it will help me deal a little better.
No wedding pictures, not sure what happened.
That's it.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Big Girl Bed
We are extremely lucky that in the 27-months that Addy has been alive, she's never once tried to climb out of her crib, resulting in a blow to her head or any other type of injury. For some reason, once she's in her crib she has no interest in trying to get out.
That's not to say that she won't cry and scream and call repeatedly for Mama! to come and save her, but she won't attempt to escape. Which is nice.
However, I'm sure there is a weight limit on the crib, not to mention her pack-n-play. I'm pretty sure the trip for the wedding was the last time she should be allowed to sleep in the pack-n-play for safety reasons. While we have no trips planned for the very near future, we should really work on getting her to sleep in a bed so that when we do, she's accustomed to it.
Plus, 27-months is really time to move into a big girl bed. We probably should have done it months ago but just never did. We've looked at beds in the past, but as usual have a hard time agreeing on what type of bed is right for her.
C wants it as low to the ground as possible to avoid her falling out of bed. Me, on the other hand, I would love to get her a bed that has either drawers in the frame for storage or a trundle which will come in handy for guests or sleep overs. But as long as we find a bed that works, we're not too caught up on any one detail.
We thought we found one but have you seen how expensive stupid beds can be? The frame we liked was $250 which didn't include a mattress or anything. Just the frame. The lowest we've seen is about $170 with nothing included. Craig's List isn't actually very helpful either.
And not to mention that in addition to a bed, she'll need at least a dresser if not a desk or bookshelf or night stand. Jeez.
Regardless, either before or after we move, Addy's getting a Big Girl Bed!
PS. Photographer said photos should be available online today! I hope I can view them at work! I'm SO excited!
That's not to say that she won't cry and scream and call repeatedly for Mama! to come and save her, but she won't attempt to escape. Which is nice.
However, I'm sure there is a weight limit on the crib, not to mention her pack-n-play. I'm pretty sure the trip for the wedding was the last time she should be allowed to sleep in the pack-n-play for safety reasons. While we have no trips planned for the very near future, we should really work on getting her to sleep in a bed so that when we do, she's accustomed to it.
Plus, 27-months is really time to move into a big girl bed. We probably should have done it months ago but just never did. We've looked at beds in the past, but as usual have a hard time agreeing on what type of bed is right for her.
C wants it as low to the ground as possible to avoid her falling out of bed. Me, on the other hand, I would love to get her a bed that has either drawers in the frame for storage or a trundle which will come in handy for guests or sleep overs. But as long as we find a bed that works, we're not too caught up on any one detail.
We thought we found one but have you seen how expensive stupid beds can be? The frame we liked was $250 which didn't include a mattress or anything. Just the frame. The lowest we've seen is about $170 with nothing included. Craig's List isn't actually very helpful either.
And not to mention that in addition to a bed, she'll need at least a dresser if not a desk or bookshelf or night stand. Jeez.
Regardless, either before or after we move, Addy's getting a Big Girl Bed!
PS. Photographer said photos should be available online today! I hope I can view them at work! I'm SO excited!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Home Search FAIL
For those who also are my FB friends, you probably saw my status that said something about seeing 4 homes and no winners. But what I didn't mention was the utter awkward-ness of it all.
For starters, we hadn't met our realtor yet in person. We'd never sat down with her to tell her what we wanted in a house. C set the whole thing up (based on a rec. from my SIL) over the phone and through e-mail and we agreed to meet her at the first house.
The first house was my choice. It's pretty close to our current home and it was large. Like, 5 bedrooms and 3000+ square feet. The price was right and the location was pretty good for us as well. I was excited to see it, C was ok with it.
When we got there, there was a sign on the door that said "No showings today 6/18" but the old man in the garage told us to go in. The little boy inside told us that no one was supposed to be in the house because they decided they weren't ready but never bothered to call us. I was ready to leave but our realtor told the boy that his grandpa said it was ok so he sat down and let us walk around.
The house was large and the layout was nice but it was obvious that these people hadn't been caring for it. The inside needed a serious face lift. And C didn't like the fact that there was no backyard, only side yards. We were there for a max of 20 minutes and left.
The next house was nice (and def. better cared for) but with 2 bedrooms upstairs & 2 on the main floor it doesn't work for the family we plan to have. I can't have Addy downstairs from us.
The third house, OMG the third house. I had no idea what we were getting into and our realtor would have warned us but since we never told her what we wanted she didn't know. (Take notes if you are entering the home buying market!) The third house was FSBO (for sale by owner) and these owners took it upon themselves to give guided tours of the whole house. AWKWARD! He followed us all over the house, telling us what rooms were what (thanks for pointing out that kitchen, never would have guessed!) and all about when it was built/added/installed.
A few notes about this house: smelled like smoke from the moment we walked in. Carpet in EVERY. SINGLE. ROOM - kitchen, both bathrooms, AND on the wall of the wet bar in the basement! Everything was crazy old. Mirrored walls, wall paper in every room, etc.
The backyard was nice.
Needless to say, we politely viewed the house and got the heck out of there.
Fourth house was nice, but again the set up was just wrong for us and it needed a little work that I'm not willing to put into a house.
More viewings tomorrow but we are definitely off to a weird start!
Home Sellers - Don't be home when it's showing time!
For starters, we hadn't met our realtor yet in person. We'd never sat down with her to tell her what we wanted in a house. C set the whole thing up (based on a rec. from my SIL) over the phone and through e-mail and we agreed to meet her at the first house.
The first house was my choice. It's pretty close to our current home and it was large. Like, 5 bedrooms and 3000+ square feet. The price was right and the location was pretty good for us as well. I was excited to see it, C was ok with it.
When we got there, there was a sign on the door that said "No showings today 6/18" but the old man in the garage told us to go in. The little boy inside told us that no one was supposed to be in the house because they decided they weren't ready but never bothered to call us. I was ready to leave but our realtor told the boy that his grandpa said it was ok so he sat down and let us walk around.
The house was large and the layout was nice but it was obvious that these people hadn't been caring for it. The inside needed a serious face lift. And C didn't like the fact that there was no backyard, only side yards. We were there for a max of 20 minutes and left.
The next house was nice (and def. better cared for) but with 2 bedrooms upstairs & 2 on the main floor it doesn't work for the family we plan to have. I can't have Addy downstairs from us.
The third house, OMG the third house. I had no idea what we were getting into and our realtor would have warned us but since we never told her what we wanted she didn't know. (Take notes if you are entering the home buying market!) The third house was FSBO (for sale by owner) and these owners took it upon themselves to give guided tours of the whole house. AWKWARD! He followed us all over the house, telling us what rooms were what (thanks for pointing out that kitchen, never would have guessed!) and all about when it was built/added/installed.
A few notes about this house: smelled like smoke from the moment we walked in. Carpet in EVERY. SINGLE. ROOM - kitchen, both bathrooms, AND on the wall of the wet bar in the basement! Everything was crazy old. Mirrored walls, wall paper in every room, etc.
The backyard was nice.
Needless to say, we politely viewed the house and got the heck out of there.
Fourth house was nice, but again the set up was just wrong for us and it needed a little work that I'm not willing to put into a house.
More viewings tomorrow but we are definitely off to a weird start!
Home Sellers - Don't be home when it's showing time!
Friday, June 17, 2011
And So It Begins
C & I never fight. I'm not bragging, I'm just being honest. We occasionally "have discussions" and there are times we get mad at each other but we have never engaged in any screaming matches, no one has ever slept on the couch, etc. C & I are always careful to quickly talk about things so it never escalates.
That's not to say it will always be like that but it's nice to think it could be.
You can probably imagine that with my mom's condition, I'm a little more on edge lately. It definitely affects other parts of my life. I always try to leave that to the side when I'm at home with my family. I try not to be short with Addy and to remember that she's 2, and getting into messes and testing boundaries are what 2-year-olds do.
Now that we've added in the stress of finding a house, it's getting harder to keep myself in check. There are times when I just want to scrap the whole plan and just BE for a while, you know? Moving across the country, planning a wedding, buying a house, having another child - that's been our life/plan for the last 2 years and sometimes it's exhausting.
C & I have been having some "differences of opinion" about house hunting and we haven't even seen a single dang house yet! We sat down the other night to write out what we want in a house and addressed all the aspects of the house like how many bedrooms and bathrooms, square footage, etc. But we haven't yet figured out WHERE this dang house is going to be.
C seems to be pretty focused on one or two cities while I'm looking along a major highway which encompasses 6 cities. At this point, both of us are feeling like the other is ignoring what we want even though his 2 cities are in my 6 cities. I feel like he won't branch out and he feels like I'm deliberately ignoring his choices.
He said yesterday that in the end, he knows we have to get what's best for our family but he doesn't want to "lose" and that worries me. We can't look at buying a house as winning or losing, that's not the way it works. We both win when we finally find the house that not only works for us right now, but accommodates our family (what we think our family will be) 10 years from now.
But he's thinking parks and running paths and I'm thinking school districts and commutes. He's thinking about being able to walk to things and I'm thinking that I don't care if we drive as long as we love the house. He's thinking about gardening and I'm thinking about master suites.
We decided last night that we'd come up with everything we both want on a list and rank those things according to true importance and then rate each house. Hopefully that will make it less subjective and more objective.
That's not to say it will always be like that but it's nice to think it could be.
You can probably imagine that with my mom's condition, I'm a little more on edge lately. It definitely affects other parts of my life. I always try to leave that to the side when I'm at home with my family. I try not to be short with Addy and to remember that she's 2, and getting into messes and testing boundaries are what 2-year-olds do.
Now that we've added in the stress of finding a house, it's getting harder to keep myself in check. There are times when I just want to scrap the whole plan and just BE for a while, you know? Moving across the country, planning a wedding, buying a house, having another child - that's been our life/plan for the last 2 years and sometimes it's exhausting.
C & I have been having some "differences of opinion" about house hunting and we haven't even seen a single dang house yet! We sat down the other night to write out what we want in a house and addressed all the aspects of the house like how many bedrooms and bathrooms, square footage, etc. But we haven't yet figured out WHERE this dang house is going to be.
C seems to be pretty focused on one or two cities while I'm looking along a major highway which encompasses 6 cities. At this point, both of us are feeling like the other is ignoring what we want even though his 2 cities are in my 6 cities. I feel like he won't branch out and he feels like I'm deliberately ignoring his choices.
He said yesterday that in the end, he knows we have to get what's best for our family but he doesn't want to "lose" and that worries me. We can't look at buying a house as winning or losing, that's not the way it works. We both win when we finally find the house that not only works for us right now, but accommodates our family (what we think our family will be) 10 years from now.
But he's thinking parks and running paths and I'm thinking school districts and commutes. He's thinking about being able to walk to things and I'm thinking that I don't care if we drive as long as we love the house. He's thinking about gardening and I'm thinking about master suites.
We decided last night that we'd come up with everything we both want on a list and rank those things according to true importance and then rate each house. Hopefully that will make it less subjective and more objective.
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