Thursday, December 22, 2011


I feel like coming here and just pouring out all the stupid crap that's been happening lately, but I don't want to be a whiner or put all of this shit on the internet for everyone to read about.

On the other hand, its apparent to me that no one reads my blog anyway, save for like 4 people.

As of Dec. 17th, my mom has been gone for 4 months.  It seems like longer with everything that's been happening.  I'll be honest, it hasn't been a great 4 months.  I mean, I don't have a job and I'm pregnant which isn't making me super confident about our future.  I know we'll be fine and all that but its crazy to be job hunting while pregnant.

I have an interview today but its for a contract position which isn't great.  It would basically cover me through actually having the baby and then I'd be out of a job again.  At least its something right?  It puts money in the bank account and gives us some security.

So that's stressing me out.  Christmas is stressing me out just because it's our first one without mom.  I don't know really what to do or how to make it ok.  I know that whatever I do its going to be wrong, just that it's not going to feel right and its going to take us a few years to figure this whole thing out.

But I'm ready to accept it and we'll just roll with it this year.

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