Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Say Please

This is my last week home with Addy before my (triumphant) return to the working world.  I will miss it a lot more than I thought.  At first, I was terrified of being a SAHM.  I know that seems silly coming from her actual mother, but if you think about it I only spent 3-4 hours a day with her prior and C was home for most of them and the weekends too.  How do you go from 4 hours to 14?  Especially in the Minnesota winters where I can't take her to the park?

We hit our stride though and it's been really nice to have the time to relax (read: nap) and bond with her.  One thing I've decided to work on before returning to work is her manners. 

I think all kids go through the same speech patterns where first they learn the words for things, and then they start stringing the words together.  So Addy went from "Milk" to "Give me milk" but I hated the feeling of having her bossing me around so we worked on a very simple "Milk, please".  I basically refused to get her the thing she was asking for until she attached "Please". 

Then she progressed to "Give me milk please" but I still hate the way that sounds.  So demanding.  So this week I refuse to get her anything until she says, "Can you get me milk please?" and it seems to be working.  It takes her about 3 times to get it right still.  She first says "Get me milk" then "Get me milk please" and finally understands and says, "Can you get me milk please?"

The funny thing is that I don't even say anything any more.  I sit and stare at her until she says what I'm looking for.  She figured out pretty quickly what gets results with me.

The only problem with this method is that when she finally says the right thing I feel like I have to give it to her as her reward.  After all, she said it correctly.  If I'm going to say no, I feel that I have to tell her no from the get go so that she's not putting in the work and then not getting anything.  Maybe as we move forward, I'll make her say the phrase correctly before telling her no and why.

We're also working on "Yes, please" and "No, thank you" with mixed results.  We do remember to compliment her when she gets it right and she's not too bad at it but it definitely needs to be more consistent.

Mama didn't raise no rude kids.

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